


Nowhere Kids

by CharlieJ45



Series: Nowhere Kids [1]
Category: Nowhere Boys (TV)
Genre: Gen
Language: English
Status: In-Progress
Published: 2020-06-24
Updated: 2020-06-24
Packaged: 2021-03-03 19:42:40
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 3,077
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/24901021
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/CharlieJ45/pseuds/CharlieJ45
Summary: Twins Jake and Charlie Riles, Sam Conte, Andy Lau and Felix Ferne all get lost on a school trip to the forest. After a night in the woods, they arrive back at the town only to find out that no one remembers them
Series: Nowhere Kids [1]
Series URL: https://archiveofourown.org/series/1801834
Kudos: 3





	Nowhere Kids

**Author's Note:**

> I have watched Nowhere Boys Series 1 and 2 twice now and I really do love watching it. So I decided to make a fic, enjoy. Its is a very long script and took me all day to edit it and get it how I wanted it.

♪ Water, fire, earth and air. ♪ ♪ Water, fire, earth and air. ♪ ♪ Water, fire, earth and air, ♪ ♪ elements that we don't share. ♪ ♪ Walk upon this earth again, ♪ ♪ walk upon this earth again, ♪ ♪ walk upon this earth again... ♪ (Knocking at the door) 

Dad” Felix! Cut it out. 

Felix*enters the room*Hey, Oskie, want to hear my rad new song? *hands him the phone* 

Oscar” Sure. 

Mum” Felix, get your father” 

Felix” But” 

Mum” Get your father!” 

Felix” Dad! We need to go” 

Oscar” I’m fine, Mum, Really, I want to go to school” 

Felix” He says he's fine” 

Mum” Well, the thermometer says differently, Have you got the car keys?” 

Dad” Where did you leave them?” 

Mum” I don't know, that's why I'm asking you” 

Felix*hands the keys over* Here they are” 

Mum” You need to make your own lunch and pack the dishwasher too” 

Felix” Did you sign my permission form?” 

Mum” What form?” *looks confused*

Felix” Mum!” *looks at her annoyed* 

Oscar gets wheeled out by mum. 

Oscar” Great song” 

Mum” Ken, can you call Dr Atkin?” 

(Scene change)

Felix*slots his bag onto his shoulder* Can you forge my mum's signature?” 

Ellen” Or we could just not go”*pulls a face* 

Felix” It's compulsory, come on, Ellen, forgery is your superpower” 

Ellen” And I should be using it for pure evil, like identity theft, ...not some dumb bush-walk” 

Felix” It'll be fun, We will hang out together, make cutting, insightful observations about our fellow students, except it will be in nature” 

Ellen” I hate nature” *pulls a disgusted face*

Felix” Relax, I arranged for us to be together” 

Ellen” Got a pen?” 

Felix*fumbles in his bag* hands her a pen* Here” 

Ellen” Thank you” *signs the permission slip* 

Felix*pulls his phone out* Oh, hey - want to listen to this new song I wrote?” *Increases volume* 

Water, fire, earth and air... 

Ellen*looks at him*smiles* That's good! It is, isn't it?” 

(Scene changes) 

A man was standing on the doorstep banging on the wire gate that separated the house from the garden. He was demanding they open up for not paying their rent. 

Phil” Sarah, open up! Come on, Sarah. I know you're in there, come on!” 

Mum” You two are gonna be late for school” 

Jake” You are gonna be late for work.” 

Phil” You're three weeks late with the rent again” 

Mum” Just duck out the back” 

Charlie” Not with him at the door” 

Phil” Sarah, I know you're in there, I know you can hear me. 

He continues banging on the door. 

Mum” I'll deal with it” *she gets up*

Phil” Come on, Sarah. Seriously” 

Mum” Would you like to tell the whole town about my private business, Is that what this is about, Phil?” 

Phil” Well, no, Sarah” 

Mum” Why don't you hassle my ex for the child support he owes?, If Gary paid his debts, I could pay mine and the world would be a better place” 

Phil” Yeah. Well, you know that I can't get it from Gary” 

Mum” Yeah well, welcome to my world. Jakie, Charlie? Have a good one, huh?” 

Charlie” Our dad's a loser” 

Jake” Good luck with him” 

Mum” What can I say? Bye” *shuts the door*

Phil” Sarah.

(Scene change)

Andy” I'm not sick, Nonna! “ 

Mu*on the phone*” I’m sorry, Mr Bates, we just don't think it's a good idea, Andy has so many allergies” 

Ni Ni” Bush is the bad place! Many poison things sting you, You probably die” 

Andy” Look, behind you!” 

Ni Ni” Come back, you silly boy!” 

Mum” Catch your brother!

Andy” Watch out”

Andy flies by his sister. 

He rushes into the garage to fond his dad. 

Dad*on the phone* Your high-impedance filter should be before your low-pass filter, No, it shouldn’t” 

Andy” Dad! Mum and Nonna won't let me go on the school excursion, and, if I don't go, it could impact my future, I might not even get into medicine” 

Dad” Tell me, how does a bush-walk relate to medical studies?, or law! either one.” 

Andy” Team building, Team dynamics?, Working in a team! Come on, Dad. Bear Grylls's mum would have let him go” 

He looks at the others a face that suggests yes you can go. 

(Scene changes)

Sam” Are we still capturing our stunt? Oh, yeah, man, I should get the camera. Mum, I'm dedicating it to you”

Mum” I wouldn't miss it for the world. And, Sam, I've got a special feast planned for tonight. Lamb roast? With barbecue sauce” 

Sam” Yeah... Sweet!” 

Mum” Sam, say hello to Mia” 

Sam” Ooh, Mia! See you later, suckers” 

Mum” Say hi, Sam... Have a good day” 

Felix” Boy band's here, "Ooh, I'm so good-looking. Everyone loves me."

Ellen” He's such an air-head. His girlfriend is so far up herself.

(Both retch)

Mr Bates” Good morning, bushwalkers. Ready to leave your comfort zones?, Andy, you made it. Hand me your permission slips before you get on the bus” 

Andy hands the permission slip to Mr Bates. 

Mr Bates*takes it* Thank you, Andy.

Thunder starts to rumble in the sky. 

Mr Bates” Although I don't like the look of those clouds. 

Jake” And he scores a goal for Bremen! Awesome goal. 

Charlie” Beat it, freak! *

Ellen*kicks the ball at Charlie* Oops, sorry. I thought it was your head”

Jake” Hey, you want to leave off my sister”*gets close to her*

Ellen” Ewww, gross get away from me”*pushes him* 

Mr Bates” Alright, everyone on the bus., Whoa. After you, Andy’ 

Jake” Bates! Favouritism” 

Mr Bates” Jacob, it's 'sir' to you, Permission slip, please” 

Mr Bates takes slips saying thank you to all the students. Charlie and Jake sit at the back of the bus and starts chucking things at Ellen and Felix. 

Charlie” Ewww, is that the stink of rotting flesh?” 

Jake”When's the last time you rejects had a shower?” 

Ellen and Felix” So funny…” 

Mia” Do you remember what day it is?” 

Sam” Um... Friday?” 

Mia” It's our anniversary” *slots a bracelet on his wrist*

Sam” Oh, a year. Already. Wow!, Um... It's awesome, babe, Thank you, Hey, I'm shooting a sponsorship video tomorrow and I'm gonna be skating a 12-stair rail, Hey, come along and cheer. You're gonna look great” 

Mia” Thanks” 

Mr Bates” OK, listen up - welcome to the year-10 science excursion, which is quite literally a walk in the park, the Bremen Ranges National Park. In groups of five, you will orienteer a 7km walk to a pick-up point marked on your map. You are expected to identify flora and, with any luck, fauna. Now... In the interests of breaking down social barriers and as a little treat for me, I have preselected the groups, so don't expect to be with any of your friends” 

The whole bus sounds of everyone moaning knowing they can’t be with any of their friends. They pull up into the car park and everyone hops off the bus. They come to a clearing and Andy sets his heavy bag down. 

Charlie glances at her brother and whispers something making him laugh. 

Charlie” What she does freak me out”*shoves her brother* 

Jake” Aww are you scared of Witch lady, maybe she'll turn us into zombies” 

Felix” I think she'd starve of if she ate your brains” 

Jake” Funny”

Mr Bates” OK, Year-10s, form groups of four as I call out your names. Daniel, Alexis, Tammy, Mike, Laura. Mia, Trent, Dylan, Harry and Ellen” 

Ellen” I thought we were together” *looks at Felix* 

Felix”He must've changed it”

Mr Bates continue to read out all the other names. 

Mr Bates” Next is Christian, Michelle, John, Max and Kathy, Join your group, Ellen please” 

Ellen” I’m not going!”

Mr Bates” Then we have Jake, Sam and Charlie and they are with Andy and Felix” 

Andy” Brains and brawn. Excellent choice, sir.” 

Jake” Seriously? Sir, are you right in the head?” 

Mr Bates”No, I'm your teacher, Jake” 

Sam” Hey, brainy dude” 

Mr Bates” Which leaves... Shirley, Madeline, Lily and Brian” 

Mr Bates finishes reading out the names and starts explaining the rules. 

Ellen*takes Felix’s arm* Come on, let's hitchhike back to town” 

Mr Bates” I heard that, Ellen, and no, obviously. Now one member from each team, come and get a map and a compass. You will orienteer” 

Charlie, Sam and Jake stand together while Felix and Andy grab the compass and map. 

Sam” Did you get a map?” 

Felix*holds it up* Got it” 

Mr Bates” At the third marker, lunch and refreshment will be provided, aim to be there by 1:30 pm or miss out, and I expect you all to be at the fourth and final marker by 4 pm on the dot. No late-comers.” 

Jake” Yeah. And how am I supposed to win with these netballers?” 

Mr Bates” It's a team-building exercise, Jack, it's not a race” 

Charlie” It's always a race. Let's do it” 

Everyone walks off in different direction and Jake, Andy, Felix, Sam and Charlie all walk off together. 

Jake and Charlie push Felix and Andy who falls over. Andy lands on the ground his heavy backpack pulling him down the hill. 

Jake” Come on. Can't you just go a little faster?” 

Andy” I could if I wasn't carrying twice my body weight in food” 

Sam” Wait up!” 

Jake’ You know this is a half-day stroll, right, not a five-day trek” 

Andy” Well, in my family, this is travelling light” 

Charlie then picks up the box and looks at it weird. 

Charlie” What is this?” 

Andy” Oh that’s chicken feet” 

Charlie*drops the box letting all the contents fall out* Ewwwww,, disgusting” 

Jake*laughs* Nice one sis!” 

Charlie*shoves his shoulder* Shut up” 

Andy” You know Bear Grylls drinks liquid squizz from a camel's stomach” 

Felix” What is wrong with you?” 

Sam*holds up an item of clothing, What's with the hole?” 

Andy” It's a poncho, obviously... In case it gets cold” 

Jake” I’ll poncho you to death if Trent beats us. Get it?” *chucks the poncho to Sam who then chucks it to Charlie* 

They play with it before Charlie chucks in on the ground. 

Andy” What’s their problem?” 

Felix” Just ignore them they are so up themselves being the most popular people in school” 

Andy” Who is the girl?” 

Felix” That’s Jake’s twin sister” 

Andy” Jake has a twin sister?” 

Felix” And you are meant to be the smart one” 

They then look as Sam, Charlie and Jake shout from the hill. 

Charlie” COME ON!” 

Jake” WHAT ARE YOU TWO DOING?” 

Sam” STOP MAKING OUT WITH EACH OTHER, COME ON AND NO PONCHO” 

Andy” Sure, No poncho, wait what about recording the flora?” 

Sam”Trees, trees and more trees. 'Eucalypts proliferate.' Yo, losers! I can't believe he beat us.” 

Jake” Footie coach says, when you're going through hell, keep going” 

Andy”That was Winston Churchill” 

Felix” Goths say, if you're going through hell, stop, 'cause you've arrived” 

Jake” Look, Trent's beating us, and he's got real girls on his team” 

Felix*shouts*” Yeah well your sister hasn’t been much help” 

Jake*steps up to him* Don’t you take this out on my sister” 

Felix” Oh yeah, well what are you going to do do some weird twin shit on me” 

Sam” What does that even mean?” 

Andy” Yeah well he is right, she is a pain” 

Jake” Okay the next person who insults my sister gets punched into next week, GOT IT?”

Felix” Look if you want to win so much, there's a short cut. This way” 

Jake” Good one, Dracula. Let's go” 

Andy” Maybe it's not such a good idea to leave the path, Can I see that map?” 

Felix” Just concentrate on keeping up” 

Charlie” Short cut to where?” 

Felix” Well, it looked like a short cut” 

Jake*tries to grab the map* 

Felix*pulls back* I'm the map guy, We should have brought a GPS” 

Sam” Nothing. We're officially nowhere. Meaning, we're lost. Great. Well done, freak” 

Charlie” Are we lost, Jakie are we lost?” *grips her brother*

Sam We're not lost” *holds his sister* 

All of them then fall down a huge hill and Andy and Felix land together while Sam hits the floor with a thud and the twins smack the floor beside him. They all get up grunting in pain. 

Sam” Is everyone OK?” 

Andy” Whoa! Did anyone see my backpack? “ 

Felix” Or the map?” 

Charlie” You lost the map?” 

Sam” You're the map guy!” 

Andy” Totally failed there, dude. Bear Grylls would find a river” 

Jake” Why, to get nude and eat a slug?” 

Andy” Waterways lead to civilisation. My dad reckons that if you point the 12 when you watch at the sun, north is halfway between the hour hand and 12. But I guess he wasn't wearing a digital” 

Everyone glances at Andy weird and he stops talking’ 

Sam” Come on. Cooee! (Echoes) Cooee! Food break” 

Felix” Again...? What is wrong with your metabolism?” 

Andy” Guys... Come on. Let's go. Mr Bates!” 

(Echoes) 

Sam” What time is it?” 

Jake” It's 4:08” 

Charlie” They'll wait for us, right?” 

Felix” There's your bag, Andy, We've been walking in circles” 

Sam” Does it have any food in it? I could eat my own arm” 

Andy” You know, your body can't digest its own flesh” 

Sam” I was joking” 

Andy” Oh” 

Charlie” They'll send a search party... Or a helicopter” 

Jake puts his arms around his scared sister. 

Charlie” Jakie I’m scared” 

Felix” Awww, are you scared” 

Jake” Yeah she is got a problem Dracula?” 

Felix*sighs* No” 

Jake” Then shut up” 

Jake puts his arms around Charlie and tries to comfort her. 

Sam” Hey, we're gonna be on the news!” 

Andy” Bear Grylls would light a fire” 

Sam” Any idiot would light a fire. Haven't you ever been camping?” 

Andy” My family's from Singapore. We don't camp, we shop” 

Sam” Mr Bates! Mr Bates!” 

Charlie” I’m freezing” 

Jake pulls his sister in closer giving her his jacket.

Sam” Yeah. I wouldn't mind a poncho right about now, do you think we'll starve to death before we're rescued? Like the rugby team that crash-landed in the Andes?”

Jake” What rugby team?” 

Sam*sighs* Just... Forget I said that. 

Felix” Said what?” 

(Eerie echo) 

Charlie” What was that?” 

(Thunder) 

Sam” Have you guys heard that story about the giant panther living in this forest?” Jake” It's totally a myth, dude. 

(Heavy rainfall) 

Felix” Man. Rain! I like the rain. Come on! How about some music to... just cheer us up? 

(Drilling guitar solo) On recording: Water, fire, earth and air. Water, fire, earth and air. Water, fire, earth and air, elements that we all share. Water, wash our sins away. Earth, guide us to a place. The wind brings with it fear. Flames of fire, we must face. Walk upon this earth again, walk upon this earth again. Walk upon this earth again. Walk upon this earth again, walk upon this earth again. Walk upon this earth again. 

Jake” That was supposed to be cheerful?” 

Charlie” I kind of liked it?” 

Felix looked up. 

Felix” Really?” 

Charlie*sniggers* No, of course not” 

Felix*sighs* 

Jake” Nice one sis!”

He high fives her. 

Charlie and Jake” Sam, what are you doing?”

Sam” It's pawpaw. It's a fruit, right?” 

Andy” It's for itchy crotch!” 

(Whoosh!) 

Charlie” That doesn't sound good” 

Andy” We should get moving. Come on” 

Sam” Killer storm. Run! Run! It's getting closer! Faster, nerd, faster!” 

They all scream running away from the tornado. 

Sam” This way!” 

Andy” Whoa! Whoa! Don't attack us!’ 

Roland” Hang on, you're attacking me, aren't you?” 

Felix” No, we're lost” 

Sam” And we're starving. And being chased by nature” 

Roland” Well, there's nothing there now” 

Sam reaches for the food. 

Roland” Oh, no, help yourself.” 

Charlie” It's like, a tornado was chasing us” 

Roland” Ah... Now that IS unusual” 

Andy” This makes no sense whatsoever” 

Roland” Not everything out here is easily explained” 

Charlie” Sam what about us?” 

Sam” I was literally starving to death” 

Andy” Do you know what 'literally' means? It means you're a selfish-guts” 

Sam” Sorry, dudes” 

Roland” Not to worry. The Henriettas have plenty more” 

Andy” Where did you find the solar panels?” 

Roland” Oh, I, ah, I scavenged them from a dump” 

Andy” Awesome. Can you tell us how to get to Bremen?” 

Roland” Better still, I can take you there” 

Andy” Thanks, Roland” 

Roland” From now on, you be careful in that forest, boys, oh and girl” 

Sam” Thanks, Roland” 

Jake” That thing that was chasing us, it was weird” 

Roland” You're not wrong. Dreamtime stories are all about evil spirits in the bush” 

Andy” That's superstition, not science” 

Felix” Science doesn't explain everything, Andy” 

Andy” And superstition does?” 

Charlie” Stop it, you two” 

All five of them show up in town looking around. 

Sam” Not much of a reception. Where're the cameras and the newspapers?” 

Jake” Oh! Reception. None. Have you guys got any?” Andy” Must be out of credit” 

Sam” Does our disappearances and miraculous reappearance seem like a bit of a non-event to you?” 

Jake” Look our Mum will be freaking out. So we are out of here.” 

Charlie” You have a good life, losers” 

Andy” No, we can't just separate. We just had a classic male-bonding experience. Brief man hug?” 

Jake” No way” 

Andy” See you in school, then” 

Jake” I've never seen you or you. I don't know you or you. Either of you talks to me or my sister, and I'll crush you” 

Sam” Well, I need food. See you, brainiac dude. Goth dude” 

Andy” I thought we bonded

Felix” On the upside, we didn't resort to cannibalism” 

(Scene changes) 

Sam” Mum!

(Sport on TV) 

Sam” Woo! And the crowd goes crazy as he returns from the wild. 

Brothers” Shh! Keep it down!” 

Sam” Really? Is that all you have to say? I'm back” 

Brothers” Back from where?” 

Felix” Hey, Oskie. How'd it go at the doctor’s?” 

Oscar” What doctor?” 

Felix” Dr Seuss, what do you think?” 

Oscar” What are you talking about?” 

Felix” Mum was pretty sure you were sick.” 

Oscar” Me? What's your problem?” *he gets up* 

Felix*stands back shocked* You can stand! “ 

Oscar” Yeah. And I can walk too. One step, two steps” 

Felix” Oscar, what happened?” 

Oscar*freaks out* How do you know my name? Who are you? Stay away from me, alright?”


End file.
